Bonnie’s Beach 🏖

My Life. My Experiences. My Love. My Words.

Memories For Memorial Day And A Father’s Birthday…

Today is Memorial Day. It is a day to remember those who have given their lives for this country.  Those lives have given me the freedom to write this blog, and I can never thank them enough. Some of you know that I was in the Army.  I do not consider myself a veteran of any sort, as I took an option to get out early (personal circumstances at the time) with an honorable discharge.  I was in less than a year, and I miss it.  The best part was meeting some of the best people I know and have stayed connected with through the years.  We all live so far away from one another, but thanks to FB we have stayed connected.  I appreciate them more than they will ever know.  Thank you for your service.  

Today is also my father’s 60th birthday.  The older I get the more I realize I don’t know him.  It’s no one’s fault really.  We are just two completely different people.  We don’t talk.  We don’t hang out.  We awkwardly ask how the other is doing, both wanting to have a conversation, but those conversations just seem to resemble infomercials where we’re both trying to sell coins to one another, albeit shiny ones.  Most of the time I think it’s because I’m a girl.  Other times I think I’m not logical enough to talk to him about anything resembling logical intelligence.  Other times, I think we’re just both really bad at taking walls down that have no real reason to be up.  

Needless to say, my dad and I are not very close.  Rarely do I see the side of him that lights up with boyhood brightness.  When I do see it, it’s always with someone else.  Writing this is not easy, just so you know.  This post is not meant to show how terrible my dad is or how crappy his daughter is. It may be entirely my fault that he and I aren’t closer.  It’s even harder working in the same office building and hearing how he talks to everyone else with happiness in his voice.  Sometimes I get to hear him say hi to everyone and then he walks by me.  God forbid there be any showing of “favorites” in the workplace.  There isn’t any.  He asked me to lunch once.  Well, a lunch without an agenda attached.  It was awkward beyond belief.  Here I am in my thirties expecting some sort of lecture the entire time.  It never came.  Now that was strange.  What was even more disheartening was that when he asked me to lunch, my boss was just as shocked.  My boss has watched me grow up and has known my dad nearly my entire life.  He knows, unlike anyone else in the office, how close my dad and I are not.  

For my dad’s birthday, I bought him a journal, along with a couple of randoms; the traditional sudoku book (he loves sudoku puzzles), and a steam engine die sheet metal model he can put together (something I thought was pretty cool).  My dad is sooooooooooo not easy to buy for.  What do you get a person who has everything they need and buys whatever they want, and they only tell you they want socks?  So the only truly meaningful gift I got him was the journal.  He may never use it, and that is perfectly fine.  I would actually hope he’d at least use it in some random way like to start a fire in some strange act of survivalism. At least then I would know it had served a purpose other than to collect dust.  I wrote him a note in this one.  A tradition I enjoy doing when gifting books or journals.  I believe they always add more meaning to the gift.  I’m weird.  I know this, but it makes it more personal when you write down a tiny bit of your heart on paper.  The journal is for one thing, his memories.  I told him to write down anything he wanted to.  Memories of his childhood, my childhood, whatever he wanted.  As long as they were memories.  They could be happy or sad or whatever.  I figure since we don’t sit down and have heartfelt conversations, maybe I could get to know him this way.  It’s a thought, right?  So now we will just have to see if he does anything with it.  He’s a busy man, and his free time is usually filled with something, so adding something to a voluntary to-do list may be out of the question.  I don’t know.  

What I do know is time passes faster than we realize.  Faster than I realize.  I wish there were more times than the random holidays when family would get together and talk story.  We have moved so far beyond the days of sitting around fires and sharing stories and passing on tall tales and valiant battles. Although let me just put this out there, I am a horrible story teller!!!  Absolutely terrible!  I can write a story, but saying it out loud it becomes some garbled mess of words with no point.  What I think I am really trying to say through this post, is that I do not want to speak at the funeral of a man I do not know.  Time is only going to increase in speed, and there is only so much time to get to know anyone.  If I don’t get to know the man who helped bring me into this world (albeit accidentally), then I have no one to blame but myself. He has been a dutiful dad, and I miss the days when we would play a new Nintendo game or build a new Lego set.  Those days are gone.  Now I don’t know him at all.  No more train rides.  More more high railing.  No more jumping through inner tubes in the pool.  No more running through waves at the beach.  All those memories I have from so long ago.  All the memories that aren’t made due to not knowing how to make them anymore.  Time is fleeting, and memories fade…

Happy Memorial Day

Happy Birthday Dad

-Bonnie

   
 

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Just Another Day Not In Paradise…

Living in Texas you know that Spring brings with it rain and storms and tornados and lots of wind.  We have been going through a pretty bad drought the last few years, and lake levels had been getting lower and lower and well, you get my point.  This Spring has brought so much rain that lakes are finally reaching and surpassing their normal levels!!!  Yay!!!!  But it keeps raining.  There are still clouds and gray skies and storms and uck!  I’m not complaining, we need all this rain, but come on.  Let us have some sunshiney days already!  Again, not complaining.  My mood just enjoys the sunshine a hell of a lot more than the dull gray that has been looming.  :-/

Spring also brings with it baseball season!!!!  Woohoo!!!!  I love going back to baseball games, and of course my favorite team is the Rangers!!!!  I’ve been to three games so far with a fourth one planned two weeks from today.  Heck!  I might go to another one next week for shits and giggles!!!  My game attendance doesn’t even compare to my best friend’s who has been to at least six or seven games so far.  Heck!  Two this week alone!  So much fun!!!!

Finally picked my bike up from the shop this week after leaving it there for a tune up and new cables nearly three months ago!  Took it out for a nice spin on Tuesday!  It was actually cold out!  Ok.  So not really cold per se, but it felt cold enough!  I think it was around 71 or something.  I know I know!  Not cold!  But this is someone who has already adjusted to the warmer temps of the upper eighties dammit!  Holy F!  The sun is shining right now!!  Please stick around!!!!!  

Anyway, as I had mentioned before, I decided against renting that room to instead opt for living with my parents.  Not something I am proud of, but it’s far too hot in the car at night, and it is what it is.  I enjoy getting to spend the extra time with family.  There’s only so much time you get with them in this one shot at life.  🙂  I am lucky that I live so close by.  An hour drive is really nothing when I think about the 7 hour flights from Hawaii to get back to the mainland to see everyone.  But I do miss living in paradise.  Every.  Single.  Day.  And one of these years I will get back out there!  Not just to visit, although I do plan on hopefully taking the mini me out there next summer.  She misses it too.  Now that she’s a few years older we can do more hiking and snorkeling and stuff like that.  I’m excited!  A year away, but it’s something to definitely look forward to!

Today work had a luncheon for a girl who is moving on to bigger and better things.  There was even money put into a gift card for her!  I was asked if I would like to contribute.  Nope! Was I going to the luncheon?  Nope!  Do I really give a shit?  Nope!  Do I even like this girl?  Nope!  Let’s just say she said some rude things about me thinking I wasn’t there to overhear.  She’s not on my favorites list.  Fake!  So I am happily sitting outside in my car, alone, and enjoying hearing the birds sing and writing on my blog.  I could be taking a nap, but this seems far more productive.  🙂

Anyway, I just thought I would write a quick blurb today of randomness.  Daydreaming about baseball and beer and paradise. Also dreaming about the puddles drying the F up so that I can get my skate on again!!!!!  This is just ridiculous!  Alright!  Enjoy your day and your week!  Ciao for now!

-Bonnie

Thinking about getting one of these.  Thoughts?  Would love to hear them!

   
 

   
 Got these about a week and a half ago!  Stupid Fitbit left marks on my wrist, but oh well.  

   
 

And here are some random funnies!

   
       

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Vaginas Suck!  Sometimes.  And Some Other Things…

So!  This post is for the ladies!  For the most part anyway. It is actually the product of a conversation I had with a friend earlier today, and she suggested I write about it.  So guess what!  I am!  For the guys who read this shit, you might feel at times, how can I put it, uncomfortable?  You might learn something.  Who knows!  You may find a great deal of humor in this one!  Hopefully the women reading this will see the humor!  Please see it!  😉

Some of us are currently, have, will be, have yet to, or will never go through again the joys of being a woman.  Every.  Single.  Month. Or like some, once every three months, or six months, or sporadically.  Now I won’t go into details, but I am pretty sure you are on the right track with what I am referring to.  Thank you Auntie. We know you love to visit, but we wish your visits weren’t so frequent and annoying.  It isn’t just the inconvenience of your visit, it’s the hormonal insanity you put us through!  The uncontrollable urge to want to eat everything!  The crazy sudden outbursts of anger due to the lack of patience!  The random crying during sappy commercials!  The insecurity.  The bloating. The sleepiness.  The headaches.  The discomfort.  The list goes on and on.  For some it is a walk in the park. For others it is hell.  Pure hell.  Picture this. You’re sitting around after eating a huge meal, and what’s that?  You’re still hungry?  Seconds please!  Then!  You need something sweet!  Bag of peanut butter cups?  Gone!  Glass of wine?  That bottle was excellent! Get my point?  And even after that you could still probably eat that half a cake sitting in the fridge.  On top of that, while eating until your stomach could quite possibly explode, that damn ASPCA commercial comes on!  Damn you Sarah Mclachlan!  Damn you sad animals with the big eyes!  Damn you all!!!  Catch my drift?

That’s not the only reason why vaginas suck at times.  You’d think that’s enough, but wait!  There’s more!  Take the workplace for instance.  You work in a very male dominated field.  You work with a bunch of guys.  Your sense of humor is probably far worse than theirs, but can you crack the same kind of jokes?  Oh hell no!  While the boys can crack jokes laced with immature, sexual humor, you do it and they look at you like you just said the words vaginal discharge. Yeah.  That face.  It is a gross word pairing, but I am just using it as a reference.  Let’s face it, no one likes to actually talk about THAT!  Then you complain about something or someone, and it is automatically assumed you are just bitching.  Whining.  Complaining. On the rag.  You name it. Automatically labeled as hormonal. Never fails.  No matter how much like one of the guys you may think you are, you still have a vajayjay, and it can never measure up in the length department.  

Now picture you work in a female dominant company. Oh the cattiness!  Not only does everyone sync up like a Fitbit to Bluetooth, but then you’re all hormonally out of whack!  Being bitchy and being catty really are two different things, but they aren’t separated by much.  Catty is a bit more behind the back.  They are the things you say to others about someone ranging from how much something is not in their job description to how that new girl’s haircut makes her look like a boy. Shit like that.  The bitchiness?  The things you say to that person.  To their face. That’s being a bitch.  And we ladies are guilty.  You would think we’d unite over our shared joys of reproductive organs, but nope.  It’s like we are constantly in some sort of competition for what we don’t know, and we can’t help it.  It just is.  It just happens.  Vaginas suck.  

Although there are plenty of times when they don’t.  I’m not going into any details.  Ladies, take a moment and think about those joys.  Aaaaaahhhhhh.  Much better.  🙂  Now quit bitchin about my lady post!  I kid I kid!   We ladies are pretty kick ass, and we know we are.  We definitely don’t need dingleberries to prove it!  Onto the other things…

So I decided not to rent that room.  There are a few reasons as to why, but it will just be better all around if I don’t.  I will continue with my original plan of back and forth between my mom’s and dad’s.  It will be better for the mini me as well since she will be close to her friends over the summer.  Definite plus!  This also means that my current living quarters will be moved out of my car in order to use it as it is intended.  Basically, I’ll be able to shuffle teenage girls around as needed.  Not a bad thing!   

Training has been going well.  Workouts have been changed up this month, and even though I am supposed to throw in a couple days of HIIT training a week on my off days, I have been entirely unmotivated to do it.  I have just been so damn tired the past couple weeks, and I know I need to get my ass in gear!  I don’t know why I am being so lazy with this, but I really need to be running every day at lunch again. At least a walk or something!  But I don’t wanna!  I know I should!  But I’m not.  I’ll get back into it.  Just currently in a bad slump.  I’ll pull through I hope.  Words of encouragement are welcome!!!!  🙂

Anyway, that’s the sort of the randomness that’s going on in my life.  I was asked why I was single by the old guy I spoke to about renting the room. I was also told I was a strange woman for not wanting a man to pay for everything and be taken care of.  Yeah.  Guess I’m strange.  No wonder I’m single!  Hahahahaha!!!!  

Alright!  I am off to bed!  And I got some more art done.  Nighty night!!!

-Bonnie

   
                 

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Time To Stop With The Laziness!!!!

As most of you have noticed, I have not been in my car for quite a while. Why? Well, I have been lazy. Yes!  It’s true!  L-A-Z-Y!!!  I have been enjoying the comfort and convenience and family for a few extra weeks, but the time has come where I have felt that I have come to the verge of wearing out my welcome.  This is the feeling I was hoping to never feel when staying with anyone.  So, I am currently hoping to find out about that room for rent this week.  If it all works out I may have a place for the summer.  If not, I will be buying some battery operated fans until I do.  Maybe buying some screen material too.  Maybe rigging up a swamp cooler or something.  We shall see.  So keep your fingers crossed that this guy renting a room isn’t completely oogie!  I’m basically going to just shower and sleep there during the week.  If cats are welcome that’s even more of a plus, because one of mine is driving my mom nuts, and she’s threatening to throw her outside.  I am taking the threats seriously. So, unless someone wants to volunteer to watch a cat for a few months, I need to find a place that’s pet friendly.  That makes it even more difficult, but not impossible. Wish me luck!

A lot of you don’t know that I got some artwork done last Wednesday.  I am planning on getting more done in the very near future.  

  

It’s on my right shoulder and it is an ode to my grandma.  I miss her everyday.  The next couple I get will be for my mom and my mini me, and they will just have to see.  The pieces I plan on getting all have meanings to me whether the people they represent understand them or not.  Have no fear.  I will not be getting any tats on my face. You know. Just in case that thought randomly occurred to you and struck you with momentary horror!   

This past weekend was pretty awesome!  Tiring but totally worth it!!  Friday I had my brew mile and went to an art show in Deep Ellum.  My trainer actually ran it with me!  It was a ton of fun!!!  Then I kicked his ass at cornhole.  That was even more fun!  Saturday morning was a terrible day for training, but I went, and it was awful.  Between the serious lack of sleep and a lot of beer the night before, my body didn’t want any part of it!  None!  It was baaaaaaaaad.  That afternoon was my friend’s birthday gathering at a coworker’s house.  He and his wife made a ton of homemade pizza, and it was sooooooooo good!!!  I hadn’t eaten pizza in over four months, so I definitely enjoyed it! Beer, pizza, good people, it was great!  Hung out at her house that night where we watched Ouija.  It was stupid.  It was a stupid horror film   The funny part was that my mini me and my friend were both creeped out and couldn’t sleep.  I made it worse by cracking jokes in poor, horror taste, and I had a blast!  I don’t think she’ll ever watch another scary movie with me.  

Sunday was MayFest!!!  Annual tradition with the munchkin, and my friend joined us with her two munchkins.  It was a lot of fun!  Rode some rides.  Got to eat my fries Oreos and meat pies from the same vendor who is there every year!  Her food is so damn good!!!  Tried her gator bites, which were far better than any I have eaten at a Cajun place. Mmmmmmmmmmmm!!!!  We walked around the vendors that were set up, and the two younger kids did sand art.  We rode on the Ferris wheel, and the mini me and I rode the tilt a whirl!  We were both super excited it was back, because it wasn’t there last year.  Got to pet the waterskiing squirrel!!  So cute!!!  Got to feed a white tiger!  That was pretty cool!  I’ll post pics of it all at the bottom.  

Anyway, I am super sleepy and need to get to passing out. Oh!  My munchkin has her colorguard tryouts going on this week!  Keep your fingers crossed that she makes the varsity team for her freshman year of high school!!  She is growing up way too fast!!!  She’s also super talented at what she does, and she loves it!  I am pretty sure she’ll make it, since she practices every chance she gets!  Alright, hope you at least slightly enjoyed the post tonight.  I have more I could write about, but it’s late.  I’ll write more in the next couple days. Good night and sweet dreams!!!

-Bonnie

   

               

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